Bad Bunny and Timothee Chalamet: The ‘Kardashian curse’

Emasculated! Bankrupt! Serial cheater! Drug habit! Canceled! Dropped by manufacturers!

As Timothée Chalamet and Dangerous Bunny embark on romances with Kylie and Kendall Jenner (respectively) now we have to ask: Can we fastidiously pad the “Name Me By Your Title” actor and “Soy Peor” rapper in bubble wrap, please?

Severely, followers are involved that the notorious “Kardashian Curse” will strike down Chalamet and Dangerous Bunny (whose actual title is Benito Antonio Martínez Ocasio) throughout their prime. And with good cause.

The “Kardashian Curse” has wreaked havoc on almost the entire males the KarJenner clan date and/or marry.

“Their life type of simply goes downhill,” conceded Kylie throughout a June 2016 episode of “Retaining Up with the Kardashians.”

Let’s hope that’s not the case with Chalamet, 27, who was nominated for an Oscar in 2018 and has made good decisions in his profession.

However right here’s the excellent news for Chalamet’s devoted fanbase.

This isn’t his first rodeo!

The “Dune” star has locked lips with well-known nepo-babies earlier than, together with Lourdes Leon and Lily-Rose Depp.

And we’re hoping Chalamet navigates his affair with Kylie — nevertheless lengthy it lasts — as seamlessly as he’s ascended to the height of Hollywood stardom. 

Dangerous Bunny, 29, appears to be in a extra precarious scenario.

Not solely has he been extra seen with Kendall, together with throughout final weekend’s buzzy Coachella, however he’s lately exiting a five-year relationship with singer and jewellery designer Gabriela Berlingeri. 

Traditionally, relationships begun on the rebound — Lamar with Khloe, for example — have been the kiss of dying for KarJenner’s victims.

And final month Dangerous Bunny was sued by one other former girlfriend, Carliz De La Cruz Hernández, for $40 million over a voice recording she supplied the singer earlier than he grew to become well-known. 

In reality, not many paramours have escaped the KarJenner vortex unscathed.

Simply check out their monitor document.

On the low finish of the size? Emasculation.

Hiya, Corey Gamble! Gamble, “momager” Kris Jenner’s companion since 2014, appears content material to be a stored man, supported by Kris’ largesse and having fun with rides on non-public planes, lavish holidays, and even a $40K crocodile Birkin bag. 

Whereas Gamble remains to be within the image, a lot of the sisters’ beaus have ended up with their reputations in tatters, bancrupt, or a laughingstock.

Not for the reason that Gabor sisters have we seen such romantic repercussions!

It seemingly all began with Kim Kardashian’s lesser-known first husband, Damon Thomas.

A music producer for Justin Timberlake and Beyoncé, in 2000, Thomas met the 19-year-old daughter of lawyer Robert Kardashian (who, on the time, was the one well-known Kardashian), and the 2 shortly eloped.

Throughout their three-year marriage, Kim claimed he was controlling and bodily abusive, which Thomas has denied. 

Since then, Thomas has been tormented by cash woes together with submitting for chapter in 2012 and being evicted from his house.

You’ll positively keep in mind the title Ray J, Brandy’s youthful brother, whose 2002 intercourse tape with Kim catapulted her into stardom.

Right this moment, that’s primarily what he’s recognized for, regardless of being a singer and actor. 

Then there’s the athletes: NFL star Reggie Bush, who received the Heisman Trophy and a Tremendous Bowl ring, dated Kardashian on and off from 2007 to 2010 however noticed his soccer profession fizzle after their breakup.

Kris Humphries was as soon as a rising NBA star.

However after his splashy 2011 marriage to Kardashian dissolved in a mere 72 days, his basketball profession plummeted.

Twelve years later, he’s a straightforward punchline.

Khloe Kardashian has additionally tripped up a couple of basketball gamers in her time, together with former husband Lamar Odom (who almost died from an overdose at a Nevada brothel), James Harden (who suffered a nasty basketball streak whereas they have been relationship), and Tristan Thompson (the daddy of her two kids who’s now universally considered a serial cheater).

This reputation-destroying rampage that occurs after a KarJenner dalliance appears to afflict athletes, singers, and celebrities alike. 

Take Kanye West.

Whereas I’ve zero sympathies for his blatant antisemitism, the outspoken rapper reached new lows throughout his marriage and subsequent divorce from Kim Kardashian.

In 2022, Ye managed to get canceled, boycotted, and dropped by manufacturers like Adidas, The Hole, and Balenciaga, shedding an estimated $1.5 billion over the scandal. 

Kylie’s relationship with Travis Scott, father of her two kids, additionally made headlines for the mistaken cause, when ten folks have been trampled to dying and lots of have been injured throughout Scott’s Astroworld live performance in 2021. 

The household, whereas resolutely dedicated to one another, treats its males extra like seasonal equipment than equal companions.

Nobody is saying these ladies are purposely hurtful or harmful. However they’re initially searching for themselves.

Maybe an intervention is required, with all of the KarJenner exes chiming in as cautionary tales.

On the very least, it will garner higher scores for Hulu than the present incarnation of “KUWTK.”